Tomorrow I’m headed to my first Tony Robbins event.
My hubby and I are going to be walking on hot coals tomorrow night, eeek!
Please say a prayer for us.
To be honest, I’m a bit freaked out.
Excited. And I have absolutely no idea what I’m really getting myself into.
More on that in next week’s post. (hoping to have a video of me walking across the hot coals like Oprah.)
A Seeker Must Be Willing to Embrace Uncertainty
Learning to be okay with being uncomfortable is the secret to any growth, healing or transformation. click to tweet if you agree…
But, I was not always open to this lesson.
My control freak tendencies totally took over – they fed me.
I found comfort in them. They served me. I thought I had it all figured out.
My ‘story’ was no one really “gets me” and I have to do it all by myself. Being a burden to others was off limits. Forget trusting anyone, I was too busy on the defense protecting myself.
On my quest for answers my main focus was on fixing myself. I kept asking, “what’s wrong with me?” It was painful. No one really knew because I created a really strong protector persona.
I compromised my happiness. I compromised my potential. I compromised my soul.
I could barely admit how awful I felt most of the time.
Self-help books were my friends and they helped a bit. Yoga classes were painful and helped even more. After class I’d release a ton of anger and still wonder, “what’s wrong with me?” It was a silent sick cycle.
I even became a yoga teacher on my quest to get even more answers and thought this would be enough.
It was until it wasn’t.
When shift happens…
Then I hit a ceiling in my studies. I learned that I did not need fixing but was still caught up with this trusting others thing and doing it all by myself.
I did the “therapy thing”.
That didn’t work so well for me. It was more like circling the problem again and again only to end up frustrated and feeling worse about myself. I was so confused. There had to be another way.
But I didn’t know what exactly that was or looked like.
Does this sound familiar? Can you relate?
When We Ask For the Next Step or a Sign, It Appears.
It all changed when my friend mentioned she had a reading with a healer she respected. I immediately got that inner ‘yes’ tingle and knew that was my next step.
I had a reading and the reader told me exactly what I had to do.
I thought she was a bit crazy at first.
She told me I had to get a life coach to gain clarity, help me overcome hurdles, stay focused and organize my life so it works better for me.
That I needed to have someone fully invested in my future that weighed more than my fears.
The truth is…
I ignored the advice for a few months because I wasn’t ready to let go and trust someone else with my deepest desires. All I could think about is how would this work? What if I could not find someone who got me? This is too much money.
Okay, I was open to having a reading here and there but a long-term commitment? Focused on me, my dreams, goals or my life was completely foreign to me.
I was finally going to be held accountable, invest in myself and have to show up every week and CHANGE my habits.
This was the rub.
So, I reveled in my pain until I could not stand it anymore.
I took the leap and hired a coach because the regret felt worse than my fear of the unknown.
Today I Understand Why She Was Spot On (I’m so grateful to have listened.)
Even though I was skeptical and the $$$ thing it totally stretched me and my life began to take a new shape. My dreams became my life, my relationships got better and my yoga career took off.
I have hired many coaches after that one, mostly business coaches. Some were a fit. Some were not.
I just recently I hired a personal life coach to help me move through some blind spots and hurdles I have going on in my life.
As a coach I now get why it helps to have someone outside your circle guide you. It frees up any pressure on friends and the energy is focused.
It took me a while to find the right one that felt right for me where I am at in my life. (Key word to remember here is – FELT.)
I waited for the next step to appear and moved on it.
When to Take the Leap, Invest in Yourself + Hire a Coach
It’s so easy to get advice from friends, family, co-workers or teachers and just not do it. Or stay quiet in a state of confusion, anxiety or overwhelm so we don’t rock the boat.
Another tendency is people bring their judgments about our ideas and dreams and tell us what is not possible.
Then we put our dreams on the back of the bus, never go for it and end up having regrets.
There is no right or wrong way to hire a coach this is just what I have figured out over the years. There are coaches out there for pretty much everything today so before you dive in check out the list below.
The exact steps to take before hiring a coach:
Step 1: Get radically honest with yourself. Are you doing the same thing again and again then wondering what is wrong with you? Or why it’s not working for you anymore? Are you stuck not knowing where to start?
Are you looking for new tools or ways to integrate into your life?
Do you need help with a deep internal issue, business direction, relationships, or a creative project?
Step 2: Has there been or are there any signs or next steps you ignored? (today coaching is more popular than when I first hired a coach.)
Do you see someone out there doing what you want to do or who has taken huge leaps in their life? Maybe they made changes you want to make and they have a system to do it.
Do you resonate with their message? Read their about page and find out their story. Take the time to check out their blog posts, videos or what they are up to. Get on their list and use any free resources.
See if they have free or paid products you can try or even go to an event so you can experience them.
(I offer tons of free resources and also have paid custom designed programs to work with the individual achieve their desired goals.)
Step 3: Checked out their track record. This is the best part, reading success stories. Look for the results they got. Where they started and where they are. What they say about this specific coach. Seek the proof.
If there is a website under a specific success story that you are connected with then feel free to contact them and ask what their experience was.
(this happens all the time, I get Facebook messages, tweets and emails asking about coaches I worked with.)
Step 4: Do they offer a free consultation?
My new coach didn’t. I asked if she did then we just did a call to see if we were a right fit energetically. I was already in, I just wanted to know more about her programs to gain clarity on what was best for me.
NOTE: You want to respect yourself and the coach make sure you are open with them. If you do not feel safe then take that as a clue, this is not the person for you.
Know if you are open to invest or not right now. It’s not cool to go around and just get all the free coaching you can and then not invest, using money as the issue.
You can always ask for a payment plan.
Step 5: Instead of a long commitment with a coach see what their offers are and if they have an introductory program, session or way for you to focus on one goal together.
Look at their offerings and feel into the process and ask if they are open to create something to fit your needs.
Hiring a coach is intimate and takes courage.
It is also one of the best investments you can give yourself. I say this because I have done it and it has truly shaped my life to be one I never thought possible.
There is a lot of stuff out there so make sure to feel into it and use the steps above.
Let’s get this soulful conversation going:
1. Please tell me exactly how this post was useful for you in the comments below. What did you learn?
2. Do you have any of your own steps or tips you use when hiring a coach? (love you to add them in the comments below.)
3. Curious of my method click here to apply for a free Clarity Session.
I should mention I have a couple of spots are opening up for 1:1 coaching with me. I’d love the honor to help you get clear on your next step. (Honesty is my religion and I will tell you if we are not a fit or if there is something else that is better for you.)
Thanks so much for reading, sharing and commenting. It’s such a gift to share my heart with you.
Your angel of fire,