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Trusting Yourself Enough? Or Doubting Yourself Too Much?

blog_04.11.14Sticky questions, right? They may even make you want to go to another site, but before you do that, hang with me.

The good news is it’s not black and white – it’s more of a spectrum.

See, sometimes we trust ourselves with one thing and not on another. This is normal.

And sometimes we doubt ourselves about one thing, and not about something else. Also normal.

All of us have moments of doubt. All of us have moments we trust ourselves. Tweet that

What to do when you feel like an imposter.

When I wanted to change the focus of my career from yoga teaching to coaching, I felt a bit like an imposter. I knew how to help people get out of physical pain and realized it was connected to emotional pain as well.

I trusted I could do it, yet doubted if anyone would want me to coach them since they saw me as the yoga teacher, or what I like to say, “yoga girl”.

So, I kept teaching yoga and began to pay attention to the patterns my students and clients had going on. With my private clients, I would ask some questions of what was going on in their lives to find out more.

I began to notice when someone had back pain there were money issues, fear of the future and not feeling safe. I also noticed with knee pain they did not trust themselves or were afraid of the future.

As I became more curious they revealed even more. (This was my first shift out of doubt and into trusting myself more.)

My clients began to share with me about their past abuse, fears, and what they wanted instead. I had no idea what would happen and this was interesting.

What I found was there was less time for me to doubt because I was in the field finding out information that was leading me to what I wanted to do – coach. From there I used all this information and created a workshop that was a blend of yoga and coaching.

As I began to trust myself more it became a little easier to follow my intuition even though I was still afraid of being rejected or to be seen as an imposter.

I lead a free community night workshop and had around 40 people attend. I saw I was onto something and was able to release more doubt. Some of the students asked me more questions about what I was up to outside of teaching.

This is where I got my first coaching clients and learned to keep trusting myself and take the focus off of me – focus off of doubting my ideas.

Let’s break it down. I somewhat trusted my desire to coach. I had doubt anyone would want this, but did not let that projection stop me. I began to become curious, ask questions to take the attention off of me (the doubt), and put my focus on helping others. I used the feedback to help me with my next steps.

The BIG lesson was there was less time for doubt when I put my attention on finding out more around being of service – helping out. What I’ve found in my life is the more I ask for advice from people who played it safe, the more I would be talked out of whatever I was up to and would validate my doubt.

Leaving me not trusting myself.  Sound familiar?

If you do anything new, please care enough about yourself to share your ideas or dreams ONLY with those who have taken risks and put themselves out there. Otherwise, you may never make the change, go for what you want, or create a life that is out of the box.

How to shift from doubting yourself to trusting yourself again in 20 min.

To make this change, I recommend you treat this just like working out. You want to take 20 minutes a day to increase your trust and release doubt.

No one has the power to give you permission other than YOU. (Read that again!)

Permission to live your life the way you want. Permission to do the work you want to do in the world. Permission to be who you are.  It’s up to you to give it to yourself.

The biggest step to take is to begin to trust yourself by looking inside, not outside.

Let’s get started, gorgeous!

The 15 min Trust Your Gut Exercise:

1. Set your timer for 15 min.

2. List out where you have trusted your gut and been right.

3. Pick one small thing to start trusting yourself with right now.

Maybe it’s exploring a new career, starting a project, reaching out to someone…

Then ask yourself aloud these questions:

What if I do X? What comes up? What is the best and worst case scenario?

What if I don’t? What comes up? What is the best and worst case scenario?

Feel it in your gut. Is there a pull?

The 5 min Do it Without Doubt Exercise:

With 5 minutes to do something you don’t have time for doubt. Feel the fear, it’s normal and use it as fuel for enthusiasm. You got this.

Now trust what came up, even if it scares you, take one small action to move you closer to what you want to create in your world.  

Keep doing this daily and see what happens.

Being curious and enthusiastic will replace the doubt and even if it does not work out the way you thought it would, allow yourself to validate the action.

Many years ago I had a coach say to me, fail fast. This is a golden rule for success. Fail fast, get up and do it again. The more you hesitate or not trust yourself the more you never know how to listen to yourself.

Sometimes I’ve trusted myself and I failed. But really in the big picture I learned, grew, and never failed. I was able to use this and trust myself more and let the doubt turn to curiosity when I took passionate action.

Maybe you are curious and have a desire to help others.

But have been doubting you can do it. Then I’d love to support you in choosing your path and getting inspired from 15 women who put doubt aside and followed their hearts calling to make a difference in the world.

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Even if you are not sure or are exploring what your next “thing” will be, I feel this will be really helpful to get inspired to trust yourself more and doubt yourself less.

Because I am passionate and curious about how people create their lives and businesses, I hand picked 15 top coaches who had moments of doubt and fear and put it aside to create a life and business they love.

Click here to find out more information and get your spot. (Bonus: You get a free intro to coaching tool kit when you register.)

Share your heart, trust yourself and be HEARD…

Maybe you don’t have someone in your life who has taken risk and lived as an example for you. If not, I would be honored to be that person.

So, tell me what it is you want to create in your world in the and know that this is a safe space with love and encouragement.

In the comments below, share with me exactly what you TRUST yourself with and what you want to stop doubting in yourself. You are the one to give yourself permission, so go for it!

Remember, your comment could be the catalyst for someone else to make a shift in their own life. So be bold, be brave, and know you are loved.

Your Angel of Fire,

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